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Ruben

I was walking to the train station the other day. Finished work. Walked the streets of Melbourne. Well, I should say….rushed through the streets of Melbourne. As with everyone else in the CBD from around 1630Hrs onwards….we all rush like mad cows to catch our train home on time. Forgetting that we’re going get home anyway!

Anyway….as I quickly got my ticket out of my wallet, and strategically held it in my right hand, so I can quickly place it in the reader, yank it out and go down the stairs, and pick up MY copy of MX (not anyone else trying to get in first!), I was distracted. Music. I love music.

Ordinarily at Flinders Street, the buskers aren’t that eye catching. It’s not like Burke Street mall where they might as well have big record producers there with them. Flinders Street station is a lot darker. Seedier. Vagabonds. A completely different feel and aura. However, on this occasion, on my way to my platform, I almost crashed into the group of people who had been stopped in their tracks to the music.

So I stopped to have a listen and look at all the fuss:

(This is not my photo – would love to know who’s it is – and it is not Flinders Street – Rather Cnr Flinders Lane & DeGraves St.Melbourne)

There was a young, scraggy haired bearded dude, sitting on a crate, with a bag in front of him. He had a home made single drum, drummed emphatically and passionately with his right foot. Symbols to his left….. symbolled with his left foot, his thongs almost sliding off, the symbols almost sliding off and crashing onto the oncoming pedestrian traffic…magicly he held it in place and kept the beat. His arms playing a very warn out National Style O Resonator looking guitar. Very warn out. The strumming hand held a little green ball. Full of mini beads….it shaked as he strummed. Around his neck, a harmonica. Warn out also.

All 5 instruments played together to make this passionate and frenetic  harmony. You couldn’t help but be captivated. This young scraggy looking dude, who looked like he hadn’t showered in over a week didn’t give off the impression of musical guru. But there he was. Going off like a frog in a sock. Presenting a John Butler Trio Vs. Celtic Vs. Reggae music concoction. Insane.

I looked down at his bag. I saw the Sign, CD’s $5. Wow! Most professional buskers either just have the instrument’s bag open with coins, or are selling CD’s for $20. That was a big difference. The second big difference? The presentation. Most professional buskers are selling CD’s in cases with covers. You might as well go to JB Hi-Fi! I decided to cross the barrier and buy a CD. Who cares if I missed my train! I got the last CD available. The presentation made me love this guy even more. As I picked up the CD, and gave him a 10 instead, I noticed the CD was wrapped in a piece of A4 paper…wrapped like a bloke. So similar to the music. Simple, but frenetic. Beautiful. What made me love it even more? When I took the CD out, he marked on it with a permanent marker, his name and his MySpace  address. Surround by dots. Stars? Something artistic. Something simple. And to top it of, the other side of the A4 peice of paper? Last year’s university Tutorial notes from on-line.

I don’t think this guy could have gotten any cooler.

CD lives comfortably at home now, and played often.

That is Rock and or Roll!

This attempt on the other hand, well….

Ruben

My new calendar for 2010 is out now! Visit Lulu and purchase a copy for the new year!

Ruben

You can now follow Mustang Travels on MySpace also! Pay a visit here. Don’t forget if you’re stuck for presents, visit www.mustangtravels.com!

A couple of fantastically entertaining things for this week.

1. An email doing the rounds at the moment. A hilairy-arsly way of describing a colonoscopy!

Below is a discussion on colonoscopies; this may be of interest to you

ABOUT  THE  WRITER

Dave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winning humour columnist for the Herald.

Colonoscopy Journal:

I called my friend Andy Sable, a gastroenterologist, to make an appointment for a colonoscopy.

A few days later, in his office, Andy showed me a colour diagram of the colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point passing briefly through Melbourne.

Then Andy explained the colonoscopy procedure to me in a thorough, reassuring and patient manner.

I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn’t really hear anything he said, because my brain was shrieking, ‘HE’S  GOING  TO  STICK  A  TUBE  17,000  FEET  UP  YOUR  BEHIND!’

I left Andy’ s office with some written instructions, and a prescription for a product called ‘MoviPrep,’ which comes in a box large enough to hold a microwave oven. I will discuss MoviPrep in detail later; for now suffice it to say that we must never allow it to fall into the hands of our enemies..

I spent the next several days productively sitting around being nervous.

Then, on the day before my colonoscopy, I began my preparation.  In accordance with my instructions, I didn’t eat any solid food that day; all I had was chicken broth, which is basically water, only with less flavour.

Then, in the evening, I took the MoviPrep. You mix two packets of powder together in a one-litre plastic jug, then you fill it with lukewarm water. Then you have to drink the whole jug. This takes about an hour, because MoviPrep tastes – and here I am being kind – like a mixture of goat spit and urinal cleanser, with just a hint of lemon.

The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great sense of humour, state that after you drink it, ‘a loose, watery bowel movement may result.’

This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground.

MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don’t want to be too graphic, here, but, have you ever seen a space-shuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with you as the shuttle.
There are times when you wish the toilet had a seat belt. You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently. You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally empty, you have to drink another litre of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet.

After an action-packed evening, I finally got to sleep.

The next morning my wife drove me to the clinic. I was very nervous. Not only was I worried about the procedure, but I had been experiencing occasional return bouts of MoviPrep spurtage. I was thinking, ‘What if I spurt on Andy?’ How do you apologize to a friend for something like that? Flowers would not be enough.

At the clinic I had to sign many forms acknowledging that I understood and totally agreed with whatever the heck the forms said. Then they led me to a room full of other colonoscopy people, where I went inside a little curtained space and took off my clothes and put on one of those hospital garments designed by sadist perverts, the kind that, when you put it on, makes you feel even more naked than when you are actually naked..

Then a nurse named Eddie put a little needle in a vein in my left hand. Ordinarily I would  have fainted, but Eddie was very good, and I was already lying down. Eddie also told me that some people put vodka in their MoviPrep.. At first I was ticked off that I hadn’t thought of this, but then I pondered what would happen if you got yourself too tipsy to make it to the bathroom, so you were staggering around in full Fire Hose Mode bouncing off the walls like a Looney Tunes cartoon. You would have no choice but to burn your house.

When everything was ready, Eddie wheeled me into the procedure room, where Andy was waiting with a nurse and an anesthesiologist. I did not see the 17,000-foot tube, but I knew Andy had it hidden around there somewhere. I was seriously nervous at this point.

Andy had me roll over on my left side, and the anesthesiologist began hooking something up to the needle in my hand.

There was music playing in the room, and I realized that the song was ‘Dancing Queen’ by ABBA. I remarked to Andy that, of all the songs that could be playing during this particular procedure, ‘Dancing Queen’ had to be the least appropriate.

‘You want me to turn it up?’ said Andy, from somewhere behind me.

‘Ha ha,’ I said. And then it was time, the moment I had been dreading for more than a decade. If you are squeamish, prepare yourself, because I am going to tell you, in explicit detail, exactly what it was like.

I have no idea. Really. I slept through it. One moment, ABBA was yelling ‘Dancing Queen, feel the beat of the tambourine,’ and the next moment, I was back in the other room, waking up in a very mellow mood.

Andy was looking down at me and asking me how I felt. I felt excellent. I felt even more excellent when Andy told me that It was all over, and that my colon had passed with flying colors. I have never been prouder of an internal organ.

On the subject of Colonoscopies…

Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during the exam were quite humorous….. A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients  predominately male) while he was performing their colonoscopies:

1. ‘Take it easy, Doc. You’re boldly going where no man has gone before!’

2. ‘Find Harold Holt yet?’

3. ‘Can you hear me NOW?’

4. ‘Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?’

5. ‘You know, in Tasmania, we’re now legally married.’

6. ‘Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?’

7. ‘You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out…’

8. ‘Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!’

9. ‘If your hand doesn’t fit, you must quit!’

10. ‘Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity.’

11. ‘You used to be an executive at Enron, didn’t you?’

12. ‘God, now I know why I am not gay.’

And the best one of all:

13. ‘Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?’

2. And another great way to end the week…..from the fantastic Muppets:

Stuck for ideas on what to get for a Christmas present? Visit www.mustangtravels.com for some great ideas!

Choose between:

Printed Photography/Wall Art

Framed Photography/Wall Art

Photography books

Coming soon – Calendars!

Pay a visit! www.mustangtravels.com

Ruben

My new book has just been published! Visit: Blurb.

Ruben

Through the insanely high levels of heat here in the last couple of weeks (last night was the hottest night on record, and the 2 week heat wave the hottest since 1800 and something), I’ve been studying away for my up coming exam. Anxious. Very anxious. The problem with on-line learning is that it’s easy to learn how to do a good assignment, but you don’t necessarily learn the material.  My exam is on Marketing Theory and Practice. There is so much theory, and the text book uses so many words, it goes in one eye and out the other. I’m sure that book could be cut in half.

Still….I have to keep plugging away.

It hasn’t given me much time to go out and shoot, or promote Mustang Travels as much as I would like too. But…it never stops me from dreaming and thinking of the good things to come!

In 29 days, my beautiful fiancé returns for a 2 week break from China. And then it’s a countdown of the last 6 months, then she is home for good – with my quick 2 week trip up there to bring her home. Fully total awesomes radical cowabunga dude!

Dreaming for today:  One day this baby will be in my hands:

Soooo totally awesome…..the lucky winner of the Canon Photo 5 competition will be walking away with one of these. Very awesome.

Ruben

Mustang Travels can now be followed on Twitter here.

Visit www.mustangtravels.com and follow the links to my Ph.Art account to view my new wall art up for sale.

Ruben

Though it wasn’t meant to be this year for me, the Canon Photo 5 competition is now in the hands of the public, with some really fantastic shots by some really talented photographers up for public vote.

Have a look here and vote for your favourite!

Ruben